Hate it When That Happens
I’m filling up a couple of cups at Shenandoah Joe’s and wondering why people feel the need to screw up perfectly good coffee by adding cream and sugar.
Sugar in coffee makes it taste with Bitterroot Gag Juice and doesn’t improve the taste. Maybe it’s the Golden Corral Rule—the rule that says the food is free so pile as much as you possibly can onto one plate and balance it like a circus performer to your chair without spilling it on the floor, your neighbor and your new shoes—that makes them drop bags of free sugar (1,2,3,4) into a cup half-filled with coffee and half filled with Half-and-Half, which, if I’m not mistaken, would be four halves or two wholes.
Nevermind. I’m OK. I’m just fetching some steam for some friends at KTM/Vespa and one of them likes the java on the sweet side. No problem. Not my gig, but no problem. I just pour the cream, dump the sugar and stir. Now all I have to do is put the top on it, just press it down and ...
YOW! That’s hot!
Crap, the top of the cup is smooshed and the lid won’t fit and now there’s hot, sticky, milky coffee all over the table. If it dries it’ll be like countertop fly paper and every freakin’ winter bug for miles will fly in, get stuck and die, turning this place into a entymological museum. Worse, there’s a bunch of people watching so I just can’t turn and walk away, I’m going to have to clean it up.
Man, the things you do for friends.
Posted by Bryan McKenzie at 05:05 PM. Filed under: Lunatic Fringe •
