When normal is definitely not.
Just in case you’ve been watching the party conventions and have been left thinking that all is normal and true and right in American society, what with questionable housing purchases by Illinois senators getting mansions with help from mobsters, Arizona senators who don’t know how many homes they own and Alaska governors with unwed teenage mothers, strange political contributions and interesting lawsuits pending, here’s proof of what Americans are really like.
First off, this Associated Press bit from Iowa City (in Iowa, where else would Iowa City be? New Jersey? I don’t think so...) tells us that the public school system in our country is a failure.
Seems a guy was using a purloined credit card to pick up a latte and some cigarettes and some other goodies. Not being the brightest bulb in the light, he signed his own name to the receipt when getting the smokes and, later, when the card came up stolen while he tried to buy a hundred bucks worth of stuff, he showed his valid driver’s license.
The 21-year-old rocket scientist admitted using the card, but denied taking it. The man told police he found the credit cards in his living room after a party.
He’s facing criminal charges and possible remedial common sense courses at the local community college.
In Alliance, Nebraska, a gentleman (term used loosely) had to go to court because he only had one leg to stand on after he was shot five times. Seems he was shot in the faux leg and prosecutors wouldn’t give him back the limb because they were holding onto it for evidence.
The Box Butte County Attorney’s office finally gave Val McCabe’s leg back Wednesday after a judge ordered it returned, according to the Associated Press.
They kept McCabe’s prosthetic left leg to run tests on it and get a bullet lodged inside. McCabe, 58, lost his leg below the knee in a railroad accident roughly 30 years ago.
Police removed the bullet from the leg before returning it. No arrests had been made by Wednesday.
There you have it, further proof that the gene pool is for wading.
Posted by Bryan McKenzie at 07:08 AM. Filed under: Daily Screed •
