Upon Further Review

Sorry, that headline isn’t a typo on my part. Blame that one of the Staunton School system’s newsletter obtained by this sports columnist that thanks Paul Hatcher—who is retiring from teaching and still mulling his basketball future—for his years of service to the school.

And the whole time I’m reading this newsletter, all I’m thinking is, really, a legendary baseball coach? Come on, guys. Do your homework will ya?

Hey, we all make mistakes otherwise we wouldn’t call ourselves humans. Heck, if it wasn’t for misspelling the last name Quesenbery, I would have never met one of the coolest Waynesboro sports fans in history—- the late, great Granny Q—who lit into me many moons ago for not getting her granddaughter’s name right in a photo caption that I wrote.

But, that Little Giant wasn’t a legendary coach like Paul Hatcher.

You know, the Paul Hatcher is just completed 41 years at the helm of the Leemen. Forty. One. Years. Of. Coaching. High. School. BASKETBALL. At. One. Place. Folks.

You know, the Paul Hatcher that put that school in Staunton on the basketball map and turned it into a perennial state basketball power. You know, that Paul Hatcher who wasn’t calling for double steals during an 85-game wins streak which just happens to be an official state record and in the ninth longest in the whole darned United States of America. (From sea to shining sea, baby. Sea to shining sea.)

You know, the Paul Hatcher who has the fifth best winning percentage all time in the country. (The. Country. Folks.)

You know, the Paul Hatcher who is 29th overall in wins in the whole darned country. (Again. Whole. Darned. Country. Folks.)

You know, the Paul Hatcher with the third best winning percentage among active coaches. (Again, in the country.)

You know, the Paul Hatcher that ex-players speak of like he’s a second father.

You know, the Paul Hatcher that inspired Riverheads’ Joe O’Donnell to be a coach.

“He’s done so much for so many people and it never gets publicized,“ O’Donnell said.

Bet those people he helps knows he’s the BASKETBALL coach.

Eleven time state coach of the year. Four time state champion coach. Winner of 864 BASKETBALL games. (Note, not baseball.)

You know, the guy you named the gymnasium after, not the baseball field. 

You know, the guy who was inducted into the Virginia High School League Hall of Fame back in 1995. (We’re assuming it was for his ability to coach basketball and not for knowing when to call for a suicide squeeze down by one in the bottom of the seventh. Though we could be wrong, but we’re pretty sure we’re not.)

The guy who won 32 regular-season district titles, 22 tournament titles and coached teams to 20 wins or more in 27 seasons. Oh, and let us not forget about those seven undefeated regular seasons, three of which ended in state BASKETBALL championships.  (You know, the sport they play indoors during the winter on something they call a “court” and not outdoors in the spring on something all the kids are calling a “diamond” these days.)

The guy who was honored in a joint resolution by the Virginia House of Delegates and Senate this year. (We’re guessing they honored him for all his service and coaching BASKETBALL, not baseball. But, then again, what the heck do we know?)

Yes, the same Paul Hatcher “The BASKETBALL” coach who has more wins in BASKETBALL than any other coach in any other sports in Virginia High School League history. Mind you, not baseball. The same Paul Hatcher who was, three times, a finalist for national coach of the year (1985,1996 and 2005).

So, yeah, we’re glad the Staunton School system got to thank Paul Hatcher for all those years of service.

A school system that called him a “baseball” coach in a newsletter. A school system that forgot to do its homework.