Upon Further Review

Will the Southern Valley DoesStink ever get it right? I mean, dropping the bottom seed from a five-team district entering the tournament is ludicrous. But, then again, so is making sure R.E. Lee and Waynesboro boys basketball play the same night as the girls, but at a different site.

Come on, how hard is it to give the top dog a bye entering the tournament?

Is it so hard to grasp that, um, I don’t know, R.E. Lee baseball would like another shot at somebody? Didn’t this team almost beat Turner Ashby and no-hit Wilson Memorial?

Wouldn’t Rockbridge softball like another shot at somebody—anybody—in a do-or-die situation?

Gee, I don’t know, wouldn’t that be, well, fun?

Seriously, this is a sham of a district run by administrators that might as well appear on the campaign poster for adults ruining high school sports. (Where can I get this poster so I can hang it up somewhere and charge athletes two bucks to toss darts at it? Actually, if you can find me a poster I’d invite the kids to throw darts for free. Pies? Well that’ll cost you because I hate seeing pies go to waste. Mmmm, pies.)

This district is the main enabler when it comes to sucking the fun out of high school sports. I cannot write it enough. What’s it going to take for you athletes to realize what they’re doing to you?

Oh well, I hope you don’t play a so-called “minor sport” in this district because they’ve also made it very clear when it comes to sports like, I don’t know, let’s say girls soccer, the people in charge of the biggest joke in the Shenandoah Valley have no problems taking a home match away from you. Aren’t we right, Rockbridge girls soccer?

Remember that Waynesboro soccer doubleheader? Yeah, it was freakin’ sweet and all—a twi-night Friday on the pitch, the Little Giant boys playing in front of an almost-full grandstand after the girls shut out the Wildcats. Yeah, good on soccer in Waynesboro. But the bottom line is that doubleheader should have never happened. In the girls game, Rockbridge was the home team because, well, they couldn’t play at home that day thanks to a lacrosse game being rescheduled. But I guess it’s OK to take a home match away from a girls soccer team because, and let’s be honest with each other here, you and I both know darn well that no school and no district worth its salt is going to let its football team, baseball team or basketball team give up a home game.

But hey, shouldn’t these so-called minor sports be used to this popcockery by now. Just look at what they did to Group AA basketball. The AA committee back in March voted by a 2-to-1 margin to split basketball into divisions. It voted by the same margin not to split the others sports. Yeah, great lesson there.

Nobody will ever blame you, high school athletes, if you whistle “Send in the clowns” every time a Southern Valley administrator walks by you in the hallways of your high school.

And another thing: Don’t think for a second Wilson Memorial girls softball isn’t kicking themselves right now for missing a golden opportunity to lock up the regular-season Shenandoah District title. First the Green Hornets watched last week as Page County upset Luray, then Wilson beat the Bulldogs to take sole possession of the top spot and were only a win over Page away from that Region B berth.

We all know what happened Wednesday when the Panthers implemented their small-ball mentality to hammer Wilson and its ace Summer Ramsey 7-0. It’s only the second loss the Hornets have suffered all year, so we all know this a good team with Group A (Division 2 yet? Oh, wait, of course not. This is softball we’re talking about) potential. So it’s safe to say they just couldn’t finish the job.

“The difference today was that when we played them before, they didn’t hit,” said Wilson coach Maura Stout. “Today they really hit the ball.”

So now, once again, a Shenandoah District race comes to down the wire with a three-way playoff for that first Region B berth. Page and Luray play today with the winner playing Wilson on Friday for the goods.

Gee, why doesn’t Wilson play today? It’s called a “bye” Mr. or Ms. Southern Valley DoesStink administrator. Look it up and learn something.

Hey, lookie here. Waynesboro commits only one error, hits the ball and plays consistent to score an 11-4 softball win over Harrisonburg on Wednesday. Little Giants coach Jason Aleshire says his girls are getting focused for the Southern Valley tourney and you got believe him. They’re heading into the postseason with some momentum in a wide-open race to the championship game.

No, I’m not forgetting about Fort Defiance, the hands-down favorite to win this tournament. All I’m saying is Waynesboro, on the opposite side of the four-team bracket (if you can call it that. Thanks again you no-bye loving clowns) as the Indians, faces a Stuarts Draft team that, yeah, is decent and will be great some day, but right now is beatable.

The Green Hornet boys soccer team, already locked into the Region B tourney, got a taste of what life after the district tournament will hold, when they faced Nelson County on Wednesday. Yeah, the Green Hornets lost 3-2, but to a team that made it all the way to the Group A (Division 1 yet? Of course not, this is soccer. What were we thinking?) championship game last season. And if you look at what the Governors have done to its competition this season (big wins, folks. We’re talking six or seven goals each game for the most part) you can call that loss a good one. (Though tell that the Green Hornets’ faces at your own risk.)

So Wilson, now you got a taste. Now you know what you’re going to face after battling through a tough district race.

You know it, your table is so ready.