Central Virginia residents are steadily becoming a lot more polite, thanks to manners maven and owner of The Etiquette School of the Commonwealth, Karen Bowles.

A former elementary school teacher, Bowles has done post graduate work in the fields of reading and speech and language development. Bowles knows a thing or two about working with young people. She has taught and tutored children from public and private schools in the area for more than 30 years. In addition to her experience as a teacher, she enjoys her roles of mother and grandmother, and stays involved with church and community activities. Bowles and her husband, Roger, also a local business owner, live on a farm in Fork Union.

While tutoring, Bowles began thinking about new ways that she could “make a difference in people’s lives, but at the same time, do something a little out of the box.” Inspired by the example of her own parents, teachers and mentors, as well as those special people who were influential in her son’s life, Bowles realized that a return to civility was in order. 

“I started the school on the premise that etiquette and good manners never go out of style. I saw a lack of manners in general, and a decline in etiquette in our society. Our lives are so busy today; many families don’t sit down at the table for a family dinner anymore, where many of our manners are learned,” she said. “I wanted to be a part of bringing back the social graces our parents and grandparents were taught. These skills can help young people in every area of their lives, and as they compete for placement into schools and in getting jobs later in life. I know that children will benefit from having the knowledge and confidence to handle social situations.”

After searching online for information about manners and etiquette, Bowles discovered the American School of Protocol, a division of Personal Best Incorporated, located in Atlanta, Ga. The founder and president, Peggy Newfield, has worked for years in this field, developing the comprehensive etiquette curriculum that serves as the foundation of the school. Bowles attended the weeklong training program at the school this summer, and receives ongoing training from the founder.

Classes are offered for children and adults. The lessons are designed to build on each other, with the common thread of respect in each lesson. 

“As students learn the importance of eye contact, a firm handshake, and to say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’, what they are really learning is self-respect, respect for others, and the basics of setting appropriate boundaries,” said Bowles. 

The classes for children are offered in the Bowles’ home in Fork Union. Bowles sits with the children around her dining room table, complete with beautiful place settings and elaborate centerpieces. Frequently, these “tablescapes” incorporate elements from other countries and cultures, and serve as educational tools and conversation starters. Students learn table manners, the social skills of communication, meeting new people, facing new situations, being a gracious guest, and more.

James Benson, Fork Union Military Academy Chaplain and Rifle Team Coach, supports Bowles’ mission. His 7-year-old daughter Evie was a student in the Basic Manners I Class–Youth Culture program. In this class for students aged 6-12 years, attention is focused each week on other cultures, using the different centerpieces for each lesson. These may include figurines from Germany, dolls from China or wooden hippos and giraffes from Africa. Students learn American as well as Continental style dining rules. At the completion of the class, students present a one-minute report on a country of their choice.

“Evie really enjoyed Karen’s classes,” Benson said. “I think that Karen has found a niche that is needed, and much appreciated by the community. In an age where we have become so consumed with this fast-paced, technological society, it’s nice to know that someone still believes in slowing down and remembering the importance of proper manners.” 

Bowles reports that the reaction to her business has been very supportive. But she is quick to dispel the notion that manners classes are only for parents who can afford to splurge on them. 

“I know the people in our area want the best for their children,” she said. “They spend money for riding lessons, music and dance lessons, sports equipment, etc. The parents here have already shown me that they want to equip their children with life skills, general manners and etiquette skills, beyond what they’re already teaching in their homes.”

Bowles has taught one adult class so far, called Adult Tutorial, which is a three-hour dinner, held at a fine dining establishment in the area. Students receive dining instruction before the meal, when they can brush up on the rules of good manners they first learned as children, but that may need polishing for proper business etiquette today. 

“I’ve only had one adult tutorial dinner so far, but it seemed to be a big hit,” Bowles said. “The attendees enjoyed themselves as they learned some new dining skills, and had a review of others they had been taught. I look forward to holding more adult classes in 2012.”

There are many programs available with this curriculum, so what’s next for her school? Bowles wants to offer a boys only and girls only class for teens, where they will learn rules of dress, how to tie a bowtie, how to wear clothes that fit properly, how to be a good sport, how to RSVP in a timely manner, and all the dining and social skills covered in other classes. Also planned is a class for couples, where students will learn about social guidelines, theater protocol, college and job interviews, cell phone manners and dining skills.
“Whether in a classroom at school, having dinner with the family or at a job interview, manners can make the experience more enjoyable for everyone,” Bowles said.

For more information about The Etiquette School of the Commonwealth, Bowles at (434) 996-4903or email .